Відео

I really hope that you don't own a Liberty safe. They gave the feds the master keys to them.

Am i the only one hearing tts dorn at the end there? If that isnt him im going to be supeised lol

CM14, the SS14 version of CM13, is finally opening up, and my plan was to main CL, but I’m not sure if I can ever top this

Betcha That dead guy with the p38 holster never actually had the gun, he just used the holster to stash a shit load of old cans of panzer chocolate.

A) I want to learn more about Snord's Irregulars B) Wait, so did the III have four shots total, or four for each Gauss? If the former, how the hell did it fell nine mechs in one go?

Over a year later and *still* damn good.

Lazy story, lazy deliverance, lazy Ubisoft.

wArship Not worship. Pathetic

General Aleksandr Kerensky was ACTUALLY an honorable man (unlike Nicholas's psychopathic version of "honor").. what a legend. I'd say the only Clanner who inherited an iota of his character.. was Wolf Khan Ulric Kerensky. Oh.. and Elizabeth Hazen is truly a terrifying woman..

Have you played "Rule the waves 3" Mr. Black Pants?

Damnit Tex. I've got to the mid point of this video every single time I've watched this. And never finish it because I go to The Courtesy Flush because you say "transport"! Damn you Tex!

why did you even bother re-fitting boat class at the end of last episode if you're gettig rid of them first thing here?

I've always wanted a Mauser rifle. Because some of the nicest bolt actions. Good enough for the trenches, good enough for me.

This game is now unplayable trash. The enemy ships magically stay aheadnof my faster ships so I cant ever engage them. The autopilot sends my ships in vastly different directions while chasing one enemy ship. I think he did this to bump his player game play numbers so we waste time chasing ships we cant ever catch and that bumps up the played hours making it look like people like the game rather than theybare sitting there doing nothing for an hour then never have any battle and have to end the mission or run out of time. Anyone pushing this broken, craply game makes me seriously question their ethics. 2 years and he still wont produce a direction, bearing, distance or heading report for players. Thats just plain criminal. Meanwhile enemy ship main gun gunnery is hyoer accurate even for mark 1 guns while highly advanced player guns cant hit, penetrate or have any hope of accuracy even agaibst the most basic enemy ships with the lowest tech. Player ships cost insanely huge amounts of money and certain nations have GDP caps that totally ignkre conquests, yerritorial gains or even the capture of major european power territories in Europe. If youre playing Spain, China, Japan or Russia your actions have virtually no impact on your GDP meaning the major european powers somehow magically maintain vast wealth even when you conquer them. The game is broken arcade junk.

Suing Discount Dan. Rented a nuke from him. It did go boom, but did not stop the sound of bagpipes. We barely escaped with a few nearly destroyed mechs and Mechwarriors that twitch randomly at the sound of bagpipe music…

"I did not ask if the course was clear, I said FIRE TORPEDOES!"

"...and perhaps we'll offer a job to you...'inquisitive gentlemen.'" Behold, the birth of the Imperium's Extra Special Forces. Chaos itself shall tremble in fear, for even it knows not what those unruly mad bastards are capable of...or where they're going next. Just that it would prefer to not be there when they arrive.

Signed up and received a Locust with an AC/20 crudely bolted onto the right torso. Tech said to keep the weight down he had to take out all of the armor. All of it. There is no armor. And apparently there still wasn't enough tonnage for ammo so he has a tow cable attached to a cart with extra shells in it, and was told to find a place to hide, get out, and try to get the shell to the top of the mech and through the gun's muzzle. Yes, he modified the AC/20 to be muzzle loaded. Said something about the intent of some "founding fathers".

Everything okay Tex?

I wonder if its possible to design a modern high speed triremes in a cruiser to destroyer tonnage range in this game? Then that glitch might just be funny.

Monsieur Tex, are you feeling ok?

This makes me so happy. Just, fantastic work

Tex telling me in multiple videos not to watch the entire playlist of SS13. me: "yeah, how about I do it anyway."

Ok, but seriously, why does the Blackhawk look so much bigger in comparison to the pilot than a Madcat despite the Madcat being half again the weight?

The "We refuse to pay taxes until there is a captain" "Congrats you've been promoted" was great

In the 41’st millennium you are 1 of untold millions

In this episode of Tex Talks Economics, Tex describes how idiocy tempered by the ECP leads to bad things.

Glad for Tex being in the 1% of gun nuts who knows the AR15 lore.

The Soviet Union accusing other countries of war crimes. That is rich.

Why do I keep hearing people talk about the Hot Pocket?... Is there Hot Pocket Lore that needs to be told... Very odd...

"Picric acid! It's time to war crime!" 😂

Praise be the Goons!

It's truly impressive that you've managed to play a game for over a decade, became the most famous player of that game, while avoiding getting better at it in any way. Remarkable.

Got a contract from some Kurita guy who wanted a Davion fellow out of the picture. Got the coordinates, turns out they led to an orphanage. Figured that was the wrong target so I hit the military base down the road. As it turns out the Davion fellow was actually a 5 year old orphan that was, like, 84th in line for succession to leader of the Federated Suns, and my contact wanted to get his plant, the 85th in line, to be leader by killing everyone before him so he could become heir or something. Got two gift baskets from Discount Dan, one with a bunch of kittens for my Kurita contact, and one with a low-yield nuclear warhead to send to the orphanage. Kurita guy must have been pretty excited, his ship exploded after I left. Pretty big explosion too...

Praise Z0rg

Tried using the warranty service, sent an Urbanmech in for repairs and three months later they sent back a regular trash can with a cardboard box with "AC/20" drawn on it in crayon. That was my mother's Urbanmech and she'll kill me if she finds out I tried to DFA an Atlas in it...

Dan you sent Clan Ghost Bear the wrong basket. I asked for the baked goods and you sent them a mini nuke. Now i got crazy buff clanners trying to kill me. I also got a confused message from some Capellans about how good the jam was.

Instant sub from me for mentioning Krugg, i just came here from watching his newest DF episode lol

Soviet nuclear ship range limited by food i stead if fuel.... So it never left port, huh?

Me, discovering I am a Hunchback pilot in principle. First reaction to seeing it on the market in MW5, was to stick a Sniper Cannon into the hunch, and stick ammo in the feet. Against the protests of my co-op partners.

It was made to rule the world upon the seven seas...

Rented a nuke from Discount Dan and tried to use it in a glorious last stand against Comstar forces trying to forcefully make me pay my phone bill. Turns out, didn't have any fissile material in it at all. Like, I could tell by the trace amounts that there was some there at some point, but apparently it all decayed. Like, literally all of it decayed. Uranium-235 has a half life of 700 million years or so, and I have to ask the obvious question of how Discount Dan managed to acquire a nuclear device that is older than humanity is. 7/10, didn't work but still scared and confused Comstar long enough for me to escape. I will NOT be paying my phone bi- [Message Terminated by Comstar]

Is there a server you reccomend starting out on? I've been trying to get on one of the wizard's den ones but they're always full and a bunch of the others want evidence you're not a newbie to get whitelisted.

Tex I need more!

Tex I need more Brother!

Tex When will we see more Battletech videos?

Tex defies the maxim of not getting involved in a land war in asia, and wins!

The joke about bees in the cockpit led to a mod for Battletech introducing BEES ammo for LRMS. The enemy experiences an accuracy debuff as they fight off the swarm.

*screaming*

As a mercenary, I must admit to spending a frankly absurd amount of C-Bills refitting my Marauder with enough LosTech to turn it into an Eye of God command mech that doubles as His Hammer while laughing off enemy fire... Then I cry at the repair bill any time I fail to pilot it to the standards of it's equipment, but it's oh so very worth it.